Every year thousands of kids are cut from teams because fewer positions are available with advanced competition. In some cases, coaches take time to review why the child was cut, and in best-case scenarios they may even provide you and your child with detailed information about how he can improve his chances for making the team next year. Unfortunately, not every coach takes the time to explain why a child is cut, and in some cases, the only way your child will learn if he made the team is by reading a team list taped outside the coach's door.

In many cases this experience can be quite difficult' and sometimes even traumatizing' for children. Kids today usually specialize in a particular sport that they play year-round. When the day comes that they are no longer invited to be part of the team (against their choosing), the experience of not being 'good enough' can be frustrating, humiliating, and can even lead to depression.

If your son or daughter gets cut from a sport they love, consider some of the following tips to help remedy the situation:

• If your child is ambivalent about what has happened, try asking open-ended questions, such as, "How do you feel about this decision?" If your child gives you the indication that she was ready to move on anyway, this transition will probably not be a big deal, but you should still watch for signs that she is hiding her real feelings because of embarrassment.

•Assuming your child wanted to make the team, ask if he knows what went wrong or where he could have played better. Many times, even if it's not what they want to acknowledge, kids know that their skill level just wasn't as high as that of the kids who did make the team.

• If your child has no idea what happened and truly believes she should have made the team, approaching the coach for feedback might be the next option. If the coach will meet with you (he should, assuming your request is respectful and polite), try to schedule a time that is convenient to the coach and be sensitive to his schedule.

• Before you meet with the coach, remind yourself that just because you invested thousands of dollars into your child's youth athletic experience (not to mention time spent), this is irrelevant to the coach. Coaches don't like cutting kids from teams, but when it is required they have to focus on selecting the best players, not just the ones who have the most time invested.

• Try to solicit objective feedback, if possible. Instead of accepting an answer such as your child needs to get better, try to specify what that really means. Does your child need to get stronger? Master the plays better? Hustle more?

• Once you have a short list of where your child needs to improve, talk with your child and see if she is willing to put in the extra work. If so, help her set specific goals and monitor her progress along the way. Hopefully this extra effort will secure a spot on next year's team.